So, I haven’t written in a while. Actually, that’s a lie. Over the past couple of months, I’ve probably written thousands of words in various post drafts but never followed them through to completion. This has partially been because I’ve had some writer’s block and life’s been a bit busy; but in truth, the main reason for my absence has been because I didn’t feel like listening to my own voice.

You see, this blog mainly exists for my benefit. I write to help process my thoughts and note down key lessons that I need to remember. It is me trying to make sense of life and keep my foolishness to a minimum. But sometimes I don’t feel like listening to a voice of reason, especially when I am both the source and primary target of it.

When seeking counsel from external figures you have the liberty to pick and choose how much you take on-board. If you are feeling particularly stubborn, you can ignore it all completely, adopting the ‘parents don’t understand’ mentality; choosing to believe that no one has been through or truly understands what you are going through, therefore what they have to say has no application to your life. There is no such liberty when giving self-counsel. You can’t dismiss your own reasoning by claiming the situation is too complex or unique to grasp. Personally, once I start having well-reasoned thoughts, they tend to nag at me until I take action. Sometimes, I just don’t want to deal with that. I’m too busy dealing with the stressful and unpredictable nature of life to take perspective and gain clarity. Why collect your thoughts and gathered knowledge to produce some sage advice to aid your current state of tumult, when you can get overwhelmed and crash by spending a Saturday procrastinating work and watching cheesy movies?  Leave the world of proactivity and just let life happen to you. Simple.

Well, the fact I have returned to this blog indicates that I wasn’t quite suited to the life of reactiveness. I don’t think I intentionally stopped taking charge, I just got so caught up in the demands of each day that I lost sight of the bigger picture; thus, lacked the patience and desire to think things through. But being a mere passenger in life is unsatisfying and unfulfilling. And even though, not everything going on right now is friendly and familiar, I’m sure my few decades of existence has provided me with some hints and tips to help me out. I also know a wise person or two. So, I think it’s time I call on my voice of reason and let the nagging commence.