Just a few thoughts on failure…
As a perpetual overthinker and a recovering perfectionist, over they years, thoughts about failure have made a comfortable living in my mind. Some days, the fear of failure motivates me to move, but on others, it is the cause of paralysis. But as I get more intimately acquainted with failure and time provides some perspective, I have come to realise a few things.
1. Failure is inevitable
It’s just a fact of life. No person or process is perfect, mistakes are bound to happen. It’s human nature. Does that mean we should strive for failure? No, but the fear of it shouldn’t be a call for inaction. One’s life shouldn’t be restricted by the possibility of future errors, missteps or heartbreak. Yes, caution should be taken, but that’s not where our focus should lie. If there is a risk of failure, that means that there’s also the potential for success. A success that can be so sweet and rewarding, but a success that is only accessible if you risk encountering some hardships.
2. The world keeps spinning
For the past two and a half years I’ve been journaling almost daily. Recently I’ve been reading through some older entries and, in addition to observing the growth and change that has occurred in my life, I found my journal to be an archive of my failures. It recorded my mistakes and errors of judgment. It recounted the days I let my insecurities get the best of me. It shone a light on a lot of my weaknesses. But after reading every entry that recorded one of my failings, I would turn the page and see that life went on. Whether it was a mistake made on a project, letting people down or just letting self-doubt get the better of me, the world kept spinning and I lived to see another day.
Another thing that was funny to observe was how time alters perspective. Errors that seemed like life-destroying blunders at the time, were barely present in my current memory. A few mistakes left scars, however, the majority of them were quite inconsequential in the long term. Any hurt, embarrassment or disappointment I felt wasn’t lasting. I guess there is some truth to the adage “time heals all wounds”.
3. Failure doesn’t define you, but how you respond does
At the end of the day, your response is your responsibility. Failure, though often painful, is arguably one of the greatest learning tools. It can breed strength and resilience and help correct your path. However, this requires some proactivity in your response to it. You cannot just ignore it and let it fall out of your conscious thought, but instead you need to confront what went wrong, re-evaluate actions and glean some useful knowledge to help you to better cope next time. After failure we suffer, but eventually, we recover. During that recovery process we evaluate, we learn, we regroup, we grow and finally, we move.
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Thank you Ife for this wonderful piece. I’d like to start from the last part of this reflection “After failure we suffer, but eventually, we recover. During that recovery process we evaluate, we learn, we regroup, we grow and finally, we move.”
Is the above always true? Could there be other irrecoverable, irreversible outcomes of failure that should be studied in other to gain insight to help people better navigate life to avoid or mitigate against such…..
Admittedly, that is a slight oversimplification. I agree with you, there tends to be some damage that results from failure, and it can have detrimental outcomes. But like you said, in these situations, important insight can be gained, which doesn’t necessarily alleviate the damage done, but hopefully, prevent history from repeating itself