Throughout our lives we are given many titles and labels. Some are used to describe us, some honor us, whilst others categorize us. Over the years I’ve been branded with my fair share of titles, and as I grow and change, so do they. However, there are a few descriptions that have followed me through the years. Two labels that have been repeatedly associated with me are ‘cool’ and ‘smart’. Now, I have no problem being branded as cool. I spent the first decade of my life striving for coolness, although I’m not exactly sure what I believed ‘cool’ to be. My inner 10-year-old is very pleased that people think I achieved it. And let’s be honest, if this kid isn’t the epitome of coolness, then I don’t know what is.

I have a slightly more complicated relationship with being titled ‘smart’. I think my issue isn’t directly with the title, but some of the associated behaviors and beliefs. For example, many of my peers treat me and Google as interchangeable resources. This in itself doesn’t bother me, I am happy to help answer questions. Helping others with their learning tends to help me with mine. However, frustration can build when you regularly receive 3 a.m. calls asking you to answer very googleable questions. Especially when you then have to do a google search, whilst on the phone to them, in order to answer their question. With that being said, I don’t think this is the main cause of my issue, but rather it feeds into the bigger issue of how I view myself.

For a long time, I thought being smart was my only asset. As someone who was (and still is to some degree) quiet and reserved, I didn’t have the same draw that my brasher and bolder friends did. I knew there was more to me than being able to retain information and solve equations, but no one seemed to pay much attention to those aspects. So, there was almost a need to be smart in order to compensate for, what I perceived to be, my lack of personality. This idea was reinforced by me having many of my peers relate to me as more of an academic assistant than a friend. Because of this, without realizing, I let the label ‘smart’ dictate who I was. Instead of owning the title and being appreciative of it, the title took ownership of me.

Over time, to a large degree, I was able to outgrow this mentality; but if I could talk to my younger self, I would give her this advice: don’t let worldly titles define your purpose. This is something that I have to regularly remind myself. We are all dealt different cards in life and gain a range of different titles and labels along the way. These titles may be used to describe us, but they shouldn’t define who we are.

The journey to discovering this was a very liberating one. It took away a lot of my self-inflicted pressure. Traits and talents are tools that help us discover and achieve our purpose, but our purpose is not defined by them. So now, instead of working in service of titles I’ve been given, I am slowly learning how to take full advantage of them in ways that benefit me and my vision.